Archive for April, 2009

Japan Fast Indian Very Fast!!!

Japan Fast Indian Very Very Fast!!!

There was a Japanese who went to India for sightseeing. On the last day, he hired a cab and told the driver to drive to the Airport. During the journey, a Honda drove past the taxi. Thereupon, the man leaned out of the window excitedly and yelled, “Honda, very fast! Made in Japan !!!.

After a while, a Toyota sped past the taxi and again the Japanese man leaned out of the window and yelled, “Toyota, very fast! Made in Japan!” And then a Mitsubishi sped past the taxi. For the third time, the Japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, “Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in Japan!”

The driver was a little angry, but he kept quiet. And this went on for quite a number of cars.
Finally, the taxi came to the airport. The fare was 800 rupees. !!!!

The Japanese exclaimed, “What??… so expensive!”

There upon, the driver yelled back,

“Meter, Made in India VERY VERY FAST !!!!!

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Lighter side of Poems

To make U Smile  
Roses are red, violets are blue  
Monkeys like you
.. should be kept in the zoo.                                                   Don’t feel so angry, you will find me there too                            
Not in a cage but laughing at you…
    
                                          

 

 

Twinkle Twinkle little star                                                
You should know what you are                                              

And once you know what you are                                            

Mental hospital is not so far.
 

 
 

 

 

The rain makes all things beautiful.                                      
The grass and flowers too.                                                
If rain makes all things beautiful                                        

Why doesn’t it rain on you?
 

                                                                  

 

 

I wrote your name on sand it got washed.                                  
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away.                              

then ~ I wrote your name on my heart And….

I got a heart attack straight away…
 

 
                                                                  
 

 

      
God saw me hungry, HE created pizza.                                      

HE saw me thirsty, HE created Pepsi                                        

HE saw me in dark, HE created light                                        

HE saw me without problems, HE created YOU.
   

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Clean my House

 What a Woma wants More Than Anything

 

 A woman was sitting at a bar enjoying a cocktail after work one night, when the bar door opened and the most gorgeous hunk of a man she had ever seen entered.

 

He was tall, muscular, and handsome, with thick dark hair and beautiful, sparkling green eyes, and his every movement was so masculine and sensuous that the woman could not help but stare. 

 

The man noticed that he was the object of the woman’s rapt attention, and with a sly, sexy smile, approached her. Blushing, she prepared to apologize for staring, but he leaned close and whispered in her ear.

 

“I’ll do anything,” he whispered in a deep, soft voice.

 “Anything, absolutely anything you want,

anything you have ever fantasized for only fifty dollars.

There’s just one condition… “

 

Trembling with anticipation, the woman asked him the condition. The man said, “You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.”

 

The woman gazed into his hypnotic eyes, considering the proposition, and then reached into her handbag and took out fifty dollars. She scribbled her address on a napkin, folded it around the cash, and pressed it into his waiting hand. She leaned over and whispered into his ear…

 

 

 

???

 

???

 

 

 

???

 

 

???

 

 

???

 

 

 

“Clean… my… house.”

 

 

 

 

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Think with your own Mind

A SPIRITED MIND NEVER STOPS WITHIN ITSELF; IT IS ALWAYS ASPIRING AND GOING BEYOND ITS STRENGTH

Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort in your life makes all the difference.

Subject: “The Law of the Garbage Truck.”
 

One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport. We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of
us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by just inches!  
The driver of the other car whipped his head around and started yelling at us.  My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy.  And I mean he was really friendly. So I asked, “Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and could have sent us to the hospital!” This is when my taxi driver taught me what I now call,
“The Law of the Garbage Truck.”  
He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes they’ll dump it on you. Don’t take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them well, and move on.  

Don’t take their garbage and spread it to other people at work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do not let garbage trucks take over their day.
Life’s too short to wake up in the morning with regrets, so…
Love the people who treat you right.
Pray for the ones who don’t.
Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it!
 

Have a blessed, garbage-free day!
Life is not about waiting for the Storm to pass….

It’s about learning to Dance in the Rain

Walk with your own Stick,

Dance to your own Tune,

Think with your own Mind,

Fly with your own Wings!


**Live With The Knowledge That Your Character Is Your Destiny**

 

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Don’t take family members for granted

                   A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring. This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in “fashion sense.”
    The man walks up to him and says, “I didn’t know you were into earrings.”
“Don’t make such a big deal; it’s only an earring, “he replies sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to say, “So, how long have you been wearing one?”
“Ever since my wife found it in my car.”

 

The box is empty

Some time ago, a man punished his 3-year-old daughter for wasting a roll of gold wrapping paper. Money was tight and he became infuriated when the child tried to decorate a box to put under the Christmas tree. Nevertheless, the little girl brought the gift to her father the next morning and said, “This is for you, Daddy.”

The man was embarrassed by his earlier overreaction, but his anger flared again when he found out the box was empty. He yelled at her, stating, “Don’t you know, when you give someone a present, there is supposed to be something inside? The little girl looked up at him with tears in her eyes and cried, “Oh, Daddy, it’s not empty at all. I blew kisses into the box. They’re all for you, Daddy.”

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little girl, and he begged for her forgiveness.

Only a short time later, an accident took the life of the child. It is also told that her father kept that gold box by his bed for many years and, whenever he was discouraged, he would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there.

Moral of the story:- In a very real sense, each one of us, as humans beings, have been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses… from our children, family members, friends, and God. There is simply no other possession, anyone could hold, more precious than this. Friends please do not take FAMILY and FAMILY Members for granted. Love them, acknowledge them, Hug them, and Kiss them.

 Don’t be too busy in Earning a Living that you forget to LIVE

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make someone’s day more pleasant

You Are Wonderful . . .

 

              The following story captured our heart. It happened several years ago in the Paris opera house. A famous singer had been contracted to sing, and ticket sales were booming. In fact, the night of the concert found the house packed and every ticket sold.

 

             The feeling of anticipation and excitement was in the air as the house manager took the stage and said, Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for your enthusiastic support. I am afraid that due to illness, the man whom you’ve all come to hear will not be performing tonight. However, we have found a suitable substitute we hope will provide you with comparable entertainment. The crowd groaned in disappointment and failed to hear the announcer mention the stand-in’s name. The environment turned from excitement to frustration.                  

                The stand-in performer gave the performance everything he had. When he had finished, there was nothing but an uncomfortable silence. No one applauded. Suddenly, from the balcony, a little boy stood up and shouted, Daddy, I think you are wonderful! The crowd broke into thunderous applause.  

              We all need people in our Lives who are willing to stand up once in a while and say, I think you are wonderful.

 

       And at times others are expecting this from you.
      Are you telling them how wonderful you are . . .??????????


      
Say it now and make someone’s day more pleasant

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Poems “Forget”

Forget about the days
when it is been cloudy, but

don’t forget your hours in the sun

Forget about mistakes
that you can’t change now, but

don’t forget the lessons
that you’ve learned

Forget about the times
you’ve been defeated, but

don’t forget the victories you’ve won

Forget about misfortunes
you encounter, but

don’t forget the times your luck has turned

Forget about the days
when you’ve been lonely, but

don’t forget the friendly smiles you’ve seen

Forget about the plans
that didn’t seem
to work out right, but…

Don’t forget to Always Have A Dream

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Motivational Phrases

A successful man is the one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him.

 

You never get a second chance to make the first impression.

 

Dream as if you will live for ever, live as if you’ll die today

 

Great minds must be ready not only to take opportunities, but to make them.

It is better to look ahead and prepare than to look back and regret.

 

 

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Father and Son

See past our own desires

A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer’s showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.

 As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation, his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box.

 Curious, and somewhat disappointed, the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible, with the young man’s name embossed in gold. Angry, he raised his voice to his father and said “with all your money, you give me a Bible?” and stormed out of the house.

 Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day. Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things.

 When he arrived at his father’s house, a sudden feeling of sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search through his father’s important papers and saw the still gift-wrapped Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible and began to turn the pages. His father had carefully underlined a verse, Matt.7:11, “And if ye, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Heavenly Father which is in Heaven, give to those who ask Him?”

 As he read those words, a car key dropped from the back of the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer’s name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words PAID IN FULL.

 How many times do we miss God’s blessings because we can’t see past our own desires?

 

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Laughter, teacher and child

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, “When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah” .
The teacher asked, “What if Jonah went to hell?”
The little girl replied, “Then you ask him”.



A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”
The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.”

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, “They will in a minute.”

 

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.” The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white

 

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
“Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, He’s a doctor.’
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, “And there’s the teacher, she’s dead…



The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
“Take only ONE. God is watching.”
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples…

 

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